From the Blog

July 27, 2015

Retorts to Retards

Listed below are a selection of the best retorts provided by our guests, to use on that one idiot we all seem to get when posting on social media.

While I know the title is not politically correct its best to point in advance before I get some people complaining ‘Retard,’ the word actually stems from the Latin word for “slow”.

Retorts to Retards

  • Evolution gave us all the ability to think and to then convey those thoughts in writing your comments just prove evolution should have been more selective.


  • I have been dying to ask this question of an idiot for years. How did you amuse yourself before social media? Did you simply wait for a free newspaper and spend your day shouting abuse at it?


  • They say ignorance is bliss, I can only assume you are the most contented man on the planet!Retorts to Retards.1


  • Your comments lower the IQ of the whole of Facebook


  • If your only contribution to this post is to use a single syllable then a conversation with you must be “platitudinous,”


  • I assume you are getting over a bad accident as your comments are on line with someone on a very high dose of medication. Get well soon.



  • The oldest traces of writing are the Tărtăria tablets discovered in Romania. They are estimated to be dating from 5500 B.C. Yet in a very short time and in your single post you have demonstrated that some of us will never be able to use the written word


  • There are only 86400 seconds in a day and you have made me waste 20 of them, get a life.


  • Are you using a braille screen as I have no idea what you are looking at, your comments makes no sense.


  • I would love to reply directly to you but I am reminded by a quote from – Charles Portis,True Grit  “What have you done when you have Retorts to Retards.3bested a fool?”


  • What I love about social media is “dealing with fools increases your tolerance”


  • The click of the key board is probably the only interesting part of your day, as your comments here lack anything of value.



  • Your comments show a high level of Narcissism and only demonstrates how small your world must be. Moving on…….(Do research the word before your next retort)


  • Writing gives me the chance to explore ideas, play with a language, solve problems, use my imagination and to help others do the Retorts to Retards.4same….then you came along and f___ed up my day


  • To err is human…but to post as you do must be divine. Get a life.


  • There are reportedly 6,909 distinct languages in the world and you chose to spoil the English language.


  • There are reportedly 6,909 distinct languages in the world and I have no idea which one you are using!


The most extensive catalogue of the world’s languages, generally taken to be as authoritative as any, is that of Ethnologue (published by SIL International), whose detailed classified list as of 2009 included 6,909 distinct languages.


And there you have it a retort for a retard, one thing is for sure this list will change as our guests add more of their own favourite quick fire remarks




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